Goodbye Foya, Hello River Gee

The last three months of transition were crazy as expected, but here we are at Christmas and I am already on my way home again! God certainly knew what he was doing over the last several months of transition.  It was not always easy, but I was able to say goodbye to my old projects and get excited about my new project. 

Last weekend I was in Foya to introduce the new sector manager to the projects and say my goodbyes up there.  It was sad, but good. Both the CDF and REAP staff gowned me and gave me some good bye gifts which made me feel very appreciated!  You can see some of the beautiful lappa’s they gave me below!  I will definitely find some occasions to wear them in River Gee:) And you can watch some videos of the fun dancing at the REAP end of year celebration (they made the white girls dance at the end, but I have no video of that and I am hoping no one else does either:)).

Me with the REAP staff

REAP staff gowning me

At the REAP end of year celebration

Agnes - one of the REAP staff, enjoying the dancing

CDF Program Manager Rachael and I after gowning by the CDFs.

At the same time as wrapping up my work with all the other projects, I was kicking off our new project in River Gee.  We started with an intense few weeks of hiring, getting the baseline survey completed and logframe revisions done.  We have also had some kickoff meetings and trainings with county officials and health staff.

SP staff at the county health training

Working in River Gee and using a model that heavily utilizes volunteers is not going to be easy.  The baseline survey hit home some of the challenges we knew existed - far distances, small communities, bad roads…etc.  I was sitting and reading my Bible one morning before devotions during the baseline survey and I read Isaiah 40 – one of my favorite passages.  Verse 26 says: 

“Lift up your eyes and look to the heavens:
    Who created all these?
He who brings out the starry host one by one
    and calls forth each of them by name.
Because of his great power and mighty strength,
    not one of them is missing.”

Some of the children in a community during the baseline survey

Furthermore, Matthew 6 reminds us that we are more valuable than the birds of the air and the grass on the ground; he feeds and clothes them, so certainly he will take care of us.  If God knows all the stars by name, he certainly knows each and every woman in River Gee.  The end of Isaiah 40 says that he will not grow tired or weary and his understanding no one can fathom; he will give us the strength to run and not be weary, to walk and not faint, to rise up on wings like eagles.  It will not be easy to reach each of these women, but he will give us the strength and wisdom to do it.   

My staff went above and beyond during the baseline survey – some were hired and agreed to start the next day, some walked through swamps, some walked up mountains.  And this is just the start of the three years!  I believe that just as God knows each of the women, he brought this team together and will continue to bring it together.  I love working where others are not, it is one of the reasons I loved working in Papua.  Sometimes Liberia seems overrun with NGO’s, so I am excited that this project will allow us to go beyond where the crowds of NGOs are.  But sometimes, I wonder whether I can really ask my staff to have that same passion.  Our country director confirmed that not only is that my passion, but it is the aim of SP Liberia. At our kick off meeting, he told the county officials that SP Liberia works in the places others don’t go, and it will be the same here.  He said if the drivers are not getting stuck in the mud and the staff are not walking – we are not working in the right places (my staff weren’t so sure about this remark, but they had already walked many miles for the baseline survey:)).  My prayer is that myself and all the staff will continue to be motivated to work through the challenges to reach the people of River Gee.

Unloading motorcycles from the airplane to get us around the bad roads!

I want to close by just praising God for where he has brought me over the last year, for where he has brought our health projects and staff, and for what he is going to do in 2014.  I am looking forward to a little break before continuing on and looking forward to celebrating Christmas with friends and family.  My favorite Christmas song so far this year has been a gospel rendition of the Hallelujah chorus – I just can’t help but smile everytime I listen to it – 

“For the Lord God the omnipotent reigneth – 

Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah…

And He shall reign forever and ever,

King of kings, forever and ever, 

and Lord of lords, Hallelujah! Hallelujah!…” 

A good reminder of the reason for the joyous season we celebrate each year at Christmas – Merry Christmas!

Fall Changes

I love fall – I think it is my favorite season – apple picking, pumpkin flavored everything, the cool crisp air.  But then again, I also love spring, winter, summer… I can never decide.  What I think I really love is the change of seasons; the first snow, the first flower in spring, the first swim in summer, the changing color of the leaves in fall.

I was blessed to have the opportunity to go on my home leave during the peak of the New England fall.  I greatly enjoyed being there to watch the leaves change, drink some pumpkin spice lattes, go to the apple orchard, but most of all, to have some to rest, reflect, and prepare.

Watching the fall leaves change color allowed me to reflect on change in my own life.  Just like I love the changing of seasons, I love change in my own life.  Yet I hate it at the same time!  I was asking myself how that works, how can one both love and hate change?!?  I don’t really have a good answer.

Since coming to Liberia two years ago, it seems that I am living in a perpetual stage of change.  Even though I don’t have a good answer, I have realized that I like change when I am in control of the change – what it is, when it is.  I don’t like change when I have no control – which happens to be a lot of the time!  During some of the recent changes, I commented to some of my housemates who have been here a long time that I don’t know how they have done it for so long.  But I am learning. 

I am currently going through a fairly significant change.  As of October 1^st, I have taken a new position with SP Liberia, managing a new maternal child health project out of our River Gee sub-office.  In one sense, I had control over the change and made the decision, however it involved following a clear sense of God’s leading in which I felt there was no other option (in a good way!).  

A year ago while working on the proposal for this project and during a difficult time with my projects, I said that if we got the grant I would love to manage the project.  Fast forward about 6 months when we were provisionally awarded the grant.  There was a small part of me that still wanted that change as I am passionate about the project and invested a lot into the proposal.  But a larger part of me was really enjoying where I was at in my job.  I felt like I finally had a bit of a grasp on what I was really supposed to be doing.

I had basically decided against pursuing the new position in my mind, but realized that all my thoughts on it were me, me, me.  I realized maybe I should ask God what He wants.  So one Sunday in church, I laid it before him and said if he wanted me to go, I would.  I especially had to lay down the social aspect.  I have a great community in Monrovia, and it would mean spending most of my time away from that community.  And let’s face it, as a single person, Liberia feels hard enough to meet someone, much less a distant corner of Liberia. I know anything can happen, but committing to 2 years in River Gee at least feels like a big step backwards in that respect!

Fast forward another month.  I get an email about that someone very qualified for the position was interested.  I should have been elated!  Instead, I was in tears!  What was going on???  I had to leave the office and go sit on the beach….to cry, to pray, to process.  Apparently my mind was not made up.  If a little email evoked that much of an emotional response, I knew there was something going on. 

Long story short, after meeting, talking, crying some more with various people, I felt like I needed to take the new program manager position.  I laid it before God, and he made it clear. I will admit, I have shed tears since then for one reason or another and there has been A LOT of stress with the transition, but I have a peace about it and that is what matters.

So whether I had control over this change or not – it is here!  I hired 6 new staff for the key management/supervisory positions and we came to Fish Town on Wednesday and are ready to go!  The song that has really been speaking to me is “Our God” by Chris Tomlin – “Our God is greater, our God is stronger, God you are higher than any other, our God is healer, awesome in power, our God, our God”.  As excited about the project as I am, I know there are many challenges ahead.  But I also know God has blessed us with this opportunity and has something great planned; he will get us through the challenges.

Finishing the Race

Yesterday morning I woke up and thought - “1 week ago right now, I was out on the streets of Monrovia running the marathon.”  It already feels like so long ago!  Thank you everyone who encouraged me during training, cheered me on during the race, and for the many facebook congratulations afterwards.  It truly was an amazing experience.

Yesterday morning I also woke up and thought, it’s communion Sunday again, praise God for where he has brought me over the last month, the last several months.  In June, July, and August during communion I was continually repenting and laying the same struggle before God, laying down some of those good things that were taking my center off God.  

In August, I realized that not only did I need to lay the current issues before God, but to see change in that area, I needed to let God clean out my heart and heal some past wounds.  I have been praying to desire God more, but he was gently nudging me, saying you can’t desire me with a whole heart if half your heart is scarred and wounded; there’s not room for both. 

In Foya we have some extra buildings on the grounds where our house is and one has a porch that I call my stretching place.  One Sunday in August it also became my quiet place before God, to give up some past hurts and bitterness and forgive.  It was freeing, I felt I could start over, burdenless.  “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28

I was comparing running to our spiritual race in my blog about a month ago, and it is interesting the parallel in my life currently with the marathon.  The marathon is the goal of training, the peak.  This past Sunday, I realized that after that time of healing in August, it has been a little victory, like the end of the marathon.  

The actual race was an awesome experience.  I had my run-walk plan and I started out with that, even though it put me at the back of the pack.  I felt strong the whole first half, and slowly began passing people, especially on the hills in town where I felt really good.  Running back out of town there were some tough spots, but I had little goals – not to walk during the 9 minutes of running, 2 miles between certain points.  

These got me to mile 23.  After that, I just had to push through, it really was all mental at that point.  Coming into the stadium was confusing and I was exhausted, but right at the entrance was a crowd of SP staff whose cheering enabled me to finish that last half a lap. 4:29.20 – I beat my reach goal by 40 seconds!  Though I was dead tired, I forgot the last three miles and it was an awesome feeling of accomplishment when I finished.  Maybe I will even do it again next year :)

At one of my past churches, we always read Psalm 51 before communion, so I still do that many times on my own.  I can see different points of my spiritual race where God was speaking to me through that passage.

In June, vs 6 “Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.” Lord, fill my inner places with you; your wisdom and truth.

 In July, vs 12 “restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me.” Lord, thank you for my previous joy in salvation, restore that to me and help me maintain that.

In September, vs 17 “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.” Lord, thank you for accepting my broken heart and gently leading me through, restoring me.

As I was doing the dishes yesterday morning and listening to worship music, I was just praising God and thanking him for never letting go.  Post marathon, I don’t know what my running plans are.  I need a new goal, maybe take a break and enjoy some surfing again.  Here is where the parallel ends though, our spiritual race never finishes in this life.  Maybe these past few months have been more like making it up a hill in the middle of the race and I have reached the top, for now. 

As I seek God’s wisdom and guidance, I keep coming back to Ephesians 4:27 “and do not give the devil a foothold” and Ephesians 6:10-20 – putting on the spiritual armor of God.  I will experience hurts, I will begin putting other things above God again, but by dealing with those as they come through the armor of God, I won’t give the devil that foothold in my heart.

A few marathon pictures courtesy of Chris and Wendy Simpson and Steffani Taylor

SP 10K/marathon crew

At mile 22 - thanks Chris and Wendy for the water and gu!

Finish!

Ladies staff house 10kers/marathoners

Foya visit and Marathon!

Tomorrow I run the marathon - crazy!!  I finished the training and I am excited but nervous.

Last week I finally got back to Foya - here are some pictures of what is going on in the health projects right now in Foya.  The first set of pictures are from a Community Health Evangelism/Education (CHE) training in Seema, Vahun.  We made it there, but got a little stuck getting back - praise God for our driver and Community Development Facilitators (CDFs) who got us out!  It was great to be able to get out to a new community, encourage the CHE and CDFs, and see the CHEs actively participating in the lesson.

Seema CHE training

Road to Seema

  

Philip - Seema CDF

 At the end of the week, we had all of our CDFs come together for a refresher training.  We had a good staff meeting - discussing some challenges this year and plans for next year, then we spent some time going over some of the new and old health lessons. Even our Bopolu CDFs came up to Foya by chopper for the meeting, and it was fun to have everyone together.  We even got our first all staff picture!

 On Friday and Saturday, all of the trained traditional midwives (TTMs) in Foya came together to restart the TTM network in Foya.  It was really cool to see all of the TTMs there, more than we even expected.  Below are some pictures from the event. 

One of our staff, Emmanuel, helps the TTMs brainstorm ideas for the network

One of our staff Cyrus helping with the sound system

TTMs in their breakout sessions

TTM leaders make decisions for the network

TTMs love to sing and dance - sasa's

 

 

During the TTM network the gender based violence project, LIGHT, also had a march in Foya to raise awareness.  They gave some of us these "hats" that had illustration to raise awareness on things like rape and wife-beating. 

 

It was encouraging to see some of the activities, but also a reminder of the challenges we face.  As I was training for the marathon the last few months, I focused on praying for God to work in and incite positive changes in the communities we work with. 

On Thursday I was picking a co-worker up from the airport early in the morning.  It was a beautiful morning – before the sun was up, the moon was shining so brightly it was reflecting off the ocean in front of our house.  Then the sunrise through the clouds was awesome. I was praying on the drive out to the airport and was moved to pray for Liberia as a country. Despite the fact that there is no war currently, there is still a battle going on. We need to pray for Liberia, that the light of Christ would win over the darkness here.  I praise God for the opportunity that we have to really invest in a few communities, and I pray that the little we are doing there will help that light spread.  

So as I am running tomorrow, join me in praying for Liberia, for the communities we are investing in, for the CDFs that are working there, and for the SP Liberia leadership.