Praise God Mom’s surgery went well and she is already home!! Makes me feel a little better about being here and not there:) But pray for continued quick and complication free recovery!
This was a pretty quiet week… I am working on getting the home based care recommendations and manual done so that I can focus more on the maternal child health assessment. I am enjoying the work – taking the information from my assessment, background and knowledge from the project staff, and literature on HBC and making recommendations on how home based care can be implemented next year. I don’t know if I already said this in a previous post; as much as I like what I am doing, sometimes I miss the busyness of daily nursing…I would love to find a job that includes some of both!
I got to talk to one of the nurses at the clinic this week to make sure some of the information in the manual was relevant here - that turned out to be helpful not just for verifying the manual, but she also had some useful insights into the situation with ODHA (people living with HIV/AIDS) in Tolikara. Apparently there are some ODHA in Tolikara on ARV’s managed here in Wamena and if we tread carefully and build trust we could potentially link them up with home based care. I say tread carefully and build trust because there are still a lot of stigma issues so it is not as easy as saying here is a patient, here is a volunteer – go. Building trust and dealing with stigma will be important before home visits begin and talking with the nurse reiterated this.
I have also had to think about stigma when it comes to replacing the African pictures in the manual. I first asked whether it was important to get pictures, and the answer was yes if we could. However – it would be very difficult and probably not wise at this point to take pictures of ODHA. So there was the thought that the pictures could be posed with a disclaimer and the youth forum could work on this. However there are still issues and someone brought up other difficult experiences with media and pictures both with the Choose Life and other organizations in the area. And these aren’t even specifically talking about people with HIV/AIDS but are prevention manuals. So for now will leave as is, John says the Papuans can still relate to the African pictures. Maybe in the future when stigma decreases and there are more ODHA who have publicly disclosed their status, new pictures can be added.
Sometimes it is hard being alone in a new place…trying to make a life…I often remind myself of my first year in Boston and how hard it is to find those deeper relationships right away. I have been reading in Exodus this month and I am encouraged by Moses journey; at first trying to get out of the job God has given him but ultimately becoming a great man of faith and leader with the help God, Aaron and others. Every time I read about the Israelites I wonder how they can turn away and question God so quickly after he has done such amazing and miraculous things – but then I remember I am the same way; how quickly I forget the things God has done for me. God has met me and met my needs over and over again in my life but when I face a difficult situation doubt starts to creep in, just like the Israelites.
At the end of the week, the song “Painting Pictures of Egypt” by Sarah Groves came on my playlist at the perfect time … not just because it relates to my Exodus readings, but also because it is a good reflection of where I am at as I think both about being here and what comes next. It is a good reminder not to paint a glorious picture of where I was or where I will be…there are joys and difficulties in both places, but God is constantly helping us grow in both so we can’t go back and fit in the places we once where.
"Painting Pictures of Egypt" by Sara Groves
I don’t want to leave here
I don’t want to stay
It feels like pinching to me either way
The places I long for the most
Are the places where I’ve been
They are calling after me like a long lost friend
It’s not about losing faith
It’s not about trust
It’s all about comfortable
When you move so much
The place I was wasn’t perfect
But I had found a way to live
It wasn’t milk or honey
But then neither is this
CHORUS:
I’ve been painting pictures of Egypt
Leaving out what it lacked
The future seems so hard
And I want to go back
But the places that used to fit me
Cannot hold the things I"ve learned
And those roads closed off to me
While my back was turned
The past is so tangible
I know it by heart
Familiar things are never easy to discard
I was dying for some freedom
But now I hesitate to go
Caught between the promise
And the things I know
BRIDGE:
If it comes too quick
I may not recognize it
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?
If it comes too quick
I may not appreciate it
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand
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